As we broke down this week, spring will be packed with tons of exciting new TV shows that are going to keep us glued to our couches for hours. But let’s say you’re the type of weirdo-freak who can’t quite handle binge-watching an entire season of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt followed a week later by binge-watching an entire season of Master Of None. I don’t understand you, but I can accept that you “need” things like “interaction with other human beings” and “something to eat that isn’t just reheated Pop-Tarts.”
But good news, everybody! We have just the solution for your raging case of Domatophobia: throw your TV out the window, soak in that fresh air you’ve been craving, then head over to your favorite local movie theater for some big screen action and sweet air conditioning, because spring movie season is the new summer movie season.
The shift has happened gradually as giant studios battling for box office dominance have begun releasing tentpole films earlier and earlier in the year. And as a cherry on top, there are a chunk of excellent movies being produced right now—2017 has already been a better year for blockbusters than 2016, with the likes of Logan, Get Out and John Wick 2 being huge hits with fans and critics alike. Below, we’ve picked out nine films worth checking out before Memorial Day rolls around.
LIFE (March 24th): This is how I imagine the pitch went for this sci-fi/horror movie, which has nothing to do with the game, the cereal or the recently released Drake album: “It’s ALIEN but starring DEADPOOL and THE GUY WHO EATS BAGELS OFF THE FLOOR OF THE SUBWAY!” Besides the fact that it’s taken way too long for Ryan Reynolds and Jake Gyllenhaal to do a project together, this looks like a pretty solid monsters-in-space flick (the reviews seem to reflect that).
GIFTED (April 12th): This tearjerker about a gifted child whose uncle becomes her de-facto guardian has already won the Academy Award for, “Movie I Thought Came Out Six Months Ago.” This is director Marc Webb’s first project since his disastrous turn at the wheel of The Amazing Spider-Man franchise (and a much better fit for him), and stars Captain America himself (Chris Evans), Octavia Spencer, Jenny Slate (who has been getting some good profiles out of it), and the cute kid from Independence Day: Resurgence. If you’re looking for a film to jumpstart the withering husk where your heart should be, this might do the trick!
THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS (April 14th): It’s time to lather yourself in a fine layer of baby oil, because the most important movie franchise in the history of cinema is back. It has everything a cinephile could possibly need: submarine car chases, Evil Vin Diesel, car terrorism, bald men bickering, The Rock picking up what appears to be a giant nuke and hurling it toward some bad guys, and of course, an epic number of quotes about the importance of FAMILY. If you’re still wondering whether to dip your toe in the oil, check out our epic guide to the Fast & Furious universe.
THE LOST CITY OF Z (April 14th): James Gray (Two Lovers, The Immigrant, We Own The Night) is one of the great directors of our time—and one of the few whose critical standing hasn’t garnered an iota of public interest, sadly. That alone is enough to get us hyped for his adaptation of David Grann’s nonfiction bestseller about a British explorer who becomes obsessed with a previously unknown civilization that may have existed in the Amazon. Review have already been electric and the cast is golden (Charlie Hunnam finally getting some work deserving of his talents, along with Tom Holland and Robert Pattinson)—if you’re only going to see one artsy indie movie this spring, this is the one.
FREE FIRE (April 21st): Remember the good old days when there seemed like there were a couple of fast-talking, guns-a-blazin’ Pulp Fiction/Quentin Tarantino imitations being released every year? Well, the latest film from director Ben Wheatley (High Rise) is here to scratch your itch. The action-comedy throws a bunch of great actors (Brie Larson, Sharlto Copley, Cillian Murphy) into a warehouse and lets them have some violent fun (all while wearing some vintage ’70s outfits). This film is also our best chance to hit that Nice Guys sweet spot this year.
THE CIRCLE (April 28th): Based on the Dave Eggers book of the same name, Emma Watson, Tom Hanks, and John Boyega star in this very relevant movie about an Internet company on the rise. It touches on matters of privacy, surveillance, freedom, and whether Emma Watson is the new Emma Stone. (It also contains Bill Paxton’s final cinematic role.)
GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2 (May 5th): Back in 2014, I wrote that the first Guardians movie could be the death-knell for overly-serious, by-the-comic-book adaptations: “Or at the very least, it could encourage the major studios to take more chances with their films, to let directors stamp more of their personality on the films, and to experiment with obscure heroes and locations.” And after the likes of Deadpool, Logan and Doctor Strange, it seems like it may have done the trick! So we’re excited to see what wacky, deranged adventures the Guardians team will get up to this time, especially since Kurt Russell has joined as Ego The Living Planet (who happens to be Star-Lord’s dad).
SNATCHED (May 12th): Amy Schumer has been plenty busy with her comedy tour and promoting her memoir (The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo) since the release of her first major feature film, Trainwreck, so we’re plenty curious to see how this one, which she also helped co-write, comes out. Even more exciting: the return of the great Goldie Hawn! If this comedy, about a mother and daughter who get thrown into an overseas adventure when a vacation goes awry, sparks a Hawnaissance, then we should all buy advance tickets now.
ALIEN: COVENANT (May 19th): Prometheus suffered from a bad case of Idiot Characters Syndrome, but it was a gorgeous movie, and I think Ridley Scott learned from his mistakes. All of which is to say that the trailers have gotten me very pumped for the latest installment in the Alien franchise, which stars Michael Fassbender, Katherine Waterston, James Franco, Danny McBride, Billy Crudup, and our new favorite action star, Amy Seimetz. That alien shower sex scene seems pretty wild!
Spring Movie Season Is The New Summer Movie Season by: Greezoo published: